In my attempts to feel cultural, I feel more fake right now than I have in a long time. The real bummer is I feel that way almost exclusively as a result of becoming the person I thought I wanted to be. That flow of images isn't arriving as easily as I figured it would. So what's my lesson here? A new laptop, an earl grey, and a pair of Teva's later, I don't feel particularly creative.
This also might have something to do with my decision to turn my back to God's truth today. I don't know why I do that. Just like the image Charlie Peacock paints in his song William and Maggie, God can lead me to the very edge of the world, and I can so easily respond by dropping a stone down the side and turning & returning to the very same life I had before. Where does that leave me? Is eternity a gift we can really stare in the face only to reject? How many times can I ask this question?
Instead of trying to explain this problem off in some poetic and fanciful way, why don't I spend some time in God's word? After all, Scripture is the only best way I can seek God as my foundation. I miss Him. I miss my daddy, and am amazed he still stoops down when I fall to look after me and nurse me back to health. Maybe some day he can teach me to fly.
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