The Earth, The Sky and Everything In Between

Hey world-that-won't-see-this, I saw Enchanted at the theatre last night. "But Nathan, hasn't that been out on video for months now?" I really don't know, but probably. This theatre, however, was the dollar movie, and it was worth every penny.

Right up until the last 5 minutes.

Here we have a movie that spins together themes from most of our favorite animated Disney classics. I won't run through all of them, but focus on the few that serve my forthcoming point. The old, cruel queen stepmother refuses to give up her crown to the true love-to-be of her stepson, Prince Charming. The entire movie, she plots and schemes to deny (and eventually kill) the fair maiden. I cannot stress this point enough. This theme spans 95% of the film. At the end, the poison apple spell is broken and the maiden brought back to life. The evil stepmother turns into a dragon (a-la-Sleeping Beauty) bent on killing the maiden she has sought to kill the entire movie. Except this doesn't happen. At all.

Instead, the evil stepmother completely changes course and goes after the presumed hero, leaving the fair maiden - the object of her hatred, mind you - safe and free. At that moment, the stepmother ceased to live, to breathe as a character in a story, and became nothing more than a disconnected plot vehicle. The previously-helpless maiden grew a pair, grabbed a sword, and began scaling the tower, chasing after her hero and the dragon who held him captive. eventually to save the not-so-heroic hero.

I actually enjoyed this movie until I was subjected to this horrible trick. This was no story, and no fairy tale. This was a bait-and-switch to serve a feminist agenda. The first 95% of this movie had no threading, no connection to the final 5% of the movie. This was not a movie about feminism or female-empowerment, or whatever you want to call it. Most of this movie was a modern-day rehashing of old fairy tales. The characters had their leanings and motives and grew and learned more about themselves and each other as the story went on. The surprises and twists grew organically out of the story, until the end, that is. The stepmother, who through the entire story was resolute in her focus to destroy fair Giselle, abandons her quest and decides the man must die, leaving the woman to save him. (Not that you couldn't assume this, but it's worth mentioning the man put up no fight. He was snatched up immediately and was helpless the entire climax). The woman found an innate strength not evidenced at any prior point in the film, climbed a treacherous tower, and saved the man. The stepmother/dragon, woman, and man, in abandoning their roles cast for the previous 90 minutes, ceased to be persons at all. They were no longer organic or alive, but puppets for a movie maker's philosophical leanings.

I respect philosophical views different from my own. I reserve the right to whole-handedly disagree with them, but I welcome a forum for differing views. This was not a forum for a feminist philosophy. This was not a movie about female empowerment. This was the Walt Disney Co. taking Walt Disney's traditional fairy tales and playing along with them in a very heartwarming and modern adaptation, only to completely bastardize his entire moral and essentially say 'his story was good, but we like our ending better.' Lacking is the obvious consideration or regard that his story and their ending could not be more incongruous.

All said, 'Enchanted' was an entertaining and visually stimulating rotten, dirty trick. I fear for a world where boys do not rise up and rescue the captive maiden. I fear more for a world where boys are not afforded the opportunity, much more even know their role.

"I think there's a lot better people qualified to say, 'Here's a book to explain the scriptures to you'. I don't think that's my gifting."

- Joel Osteen, on his recent book "Become a Better You", and it's failure to once mention God or Jesus Christ.

Inspiration strikes in funny places. I have written anything on this blog for nearly seven months, in part because I've been busy courting the girl I intend to marry, and in part because I'm just lazy. All that said, I was quite surprised just five minutes ago to discover a topic that has now inspired me to pick up my keyboard and write a new thought for a new year.

I opened my Christmas present from my aunt and uncle. Why they sent it UPS I don't know, as they live in the same city. Regardless, my brother and I opened their Christmas gift to us a few nights ago, and to our surprise we found an array of gift cards worth more than anyone has any business giving us, but you won't find us complaining. Among these was a $50 gift card to Target, which I spent today. My bill was $49.77. I hope you're impressed with me, because I am. What did I buy, however? A blender, in fact. A Black & Decker, 550 watt, 5-speed stainless steel blender. A few questions no doubt come to mind, for which I have a few answers. Why a blender? Because I like to 'blend in'. Wow. I really do like to blend, though. I bought fresh strawberries the other day - the kind so rich and dark you can smell the sweetness only fresh strawberries offer, without ever taking a bite. I bought the strawberries to make strawberry smoothies, only to find out the blender I thought was mine was my brother's, who lives in Austin with his blender. This leads into my second answer for the second and pertinent-to-this-blog question, which is 'Why buy a blender now, when the wedding is around the corner? Good question. We all know receiving a wedding-gift blender is among the great certainties in life.Right there with the tide, and God. The Tide, God, and blenders. The tide, however, won't save my strawberries for two weeks, much less October. God can, but I am small in faith, which leaves the blender.

So here I am in Target, eying my way through the blender aisle. I see many nice blenders of different sizes, colors, and advertised power usage. I went with the 550 watt blender, in case I ever decide to blend, oh, say cubic zirconium.

With all I've said so far (397 words), here finally is my point. No sooner had I reached to pick up my new blender when I stopped dead in my tracks, and paused for a moment of careful consideration. I knew the blender, made of (or made to look like) stainless steel was a safe choice, a neutral color that could fit in a variety of kitchens, including my own. But, what I remembered, what stopped me was the realization that those words, 'my own', were down for the count. I am getting married in nine months, and every decision I made regarding our home must be cleared with my future roommate. At no other point in my life have I stopped to consider whether the color of my kitchen appliance might not fit in with a long-term design plan. I'm not sure I've ever before thought any color on a free appliance could be a bad color. My decisions are no longer my own, and today was just one new way of affirming that wonderful truth. I say wonderful because the payoff delights me to no end. Knowing I get to wake up every morning and see my best friend who I love and who loves me, I like that. I'm thankful that while getting married means an amazing level of commitment and becoming accountable for a large amount of the things I do, that I get to grow into that side of marriage with someone as patient and kind as Cara. I'm getting married, and I will become her husband, and while she will take on my name, I belong to her as well, and I can't wait.

So the moment of realization hits me, standing in the blender aisle at Target, that I am not my own, and neither are my decisions, especially on kitchen appliances. I knew I had no choice on what to do next. I dug my phone out of my pocket from in between all the other giftcards, and gave Cara a call. She patiently told me what colors not to buy, and gave me a short list of good colors, among which was stainless steel. I was in the clear. Armed with a blender and Cara's blessing, I made my purchase and made my smoothie, much to the chagrin of some former strawberries.

I am the luckiest guy on earth. There is a girl 300 miles away that loves me for reasons I'll never understand. All I know is I don't deserve her, and she keeps coming back anyway. I can thank God for that, and do my best to honor his blessing by submitting myself to Him, and submitting in love my decisions and actions to her, my bride and partner in our life together.